being too much (and why that's perfect)
This letter is part of my ongoing series to my future babies - little love notes about being human that I hope they'll read someday. To read more letters to my kids, click here or check the "letters-to-my-kids" tag.
Hey my beautiful loves,
I'm sitting in my quiet space at home, thinking about something that happened to me a lot when I was little, and maybe it happens to you too.
People used to tell me "Nina, you're too much" and "You feel too much."
They were right. I was a lot. Music made me cry because it was so beautiful. I felt my friends' sadness inside my own body. When something was unfair, I got angry with my whole heart. I laughed until my belly hurt. I loved people completely.
People called this "too much." But you know what? This is how I learned to make beautiful things, to help people who are hurting, to stand up when things aren't fair, and to love with my whole heart.
As I wrote in my letters about all your feelings being welcome and what feelings actually are, every feeling you have tells you something important about life.
If you're reading this and thinking "That sounds like me..."
You might be one of those people who feels everything deeply. And that's not something that needs to be fixed.
Here's what I notice about people who feel deeply:
You see things other people miss - when someone's voice changes because they're sad, how pretty the clouds look, when someone needs a friend
You care about fairness
You feel happiness bigger and brighter than most people
You love with your whole heart
You make beautiful things because you feel so much
You want to help when people are hurting
Sometimes being sensitive feels hard:
Loud places might bother you more
Sad movies might make you cry for a long time
You might need quiet time by yourself to feel okay
Other people's feelings might change your feelings
You might feel tired after being around lots of people
All of this is normal if you feel things deeply.
What I'm learning about being sensitive:
I need more rest because my heart works extra hard
I need quiet spaces to feel peaceful
Some people understand sensitive hearts, some don't, and that's okay
When something feels wrong, it usually is
The world needs people who feel deeply
When someone calls you "too much":
You can think: "I feel things deeply, and that's one of the things I love about myself."
The world needs people who feel "too much." Who else will make beautiful songs? Help people who are sad? Stand up for people who need help? Love others completely?
You. People like you.
So when your feelings feel big, remember - they're not too big. They're exactly right for who you are.
a poem for you
Hasta el infinito y más allá,
Mom
